The newest member of the Craver household decided to enter this world on Election Day.
If you're wondering why I was missing in action on Nov. 6, I can explain with a picture that speaks a thousand words.
This is Grace, my little girl. For whatever reason, she decided to be born a month early, about two hours after the polls opened.
Maybe she wanted to vote – I didn't get around to the 26th Amendment in her in utero reading. Maybe she didn't want to miss all those wonderful negative campaign ads – she came into this world, no kidding, to those Bill Foster/Judy Biggert/Tammy Duckworth/Joe Walsh ads on the flat-screen TV in the birthing room.
Maybe she didn't want to miss Fox News' spectacular meltdown Tuesday evening.
I'll ask her when she's old enough to talk. Right now, her skill sets are limited to eating every three hours and filling diapers. And I'm the happiest guy on the planet.
And when I embarrass her by cleaning my rifles and putting the fear of God into the first boy who takes her out on a date, I'll be even with the little stinker.
By the way, kid, you're not dating until you're at least 30.
Senior Writer Kevin Craver can be reached at email@example.com.