To the Editor:
I would like to thank Mike Lesperance, Nunda Township highway commissioner, for the beautiful new drainage ditch in front of my home.
I regret that it does not connect with Lake Michigan because it’s big enough to float my yacht.
I hope my neighbors don’t mind that it will never get mowed. You see, I’m afraid of heights, and the vertical drop is a bit too much for me.
And neighbors, the corner roadway will still flood. That’s because, as far as I know, no engineering work was done when Lesperance came up with the idea to combine two drainage easements into one in front of my house. When I asked to see his engineering plans, I was ushered out of his office.
Rather than spend the money to engineer this project and put the water runoff underground, it appears Lesperance would rather shoot from the hip and build a second Suez Canal that does not solve drainage problems, but rather relocates them.
Thanks for helping beautify and upgrading our residential neighborhood, Mike. I think we’ll have bobsled races this winter.
And finally, I’m most appreciative of how you worked with me, the homeowner, on this project by not returning my phone calls and kicking me out of your office.
I guess I now know why they call you “Iron Mike.” I hope you eventually get the hang of this public-service thing.