Good 
vibrations

When Anna Wolk’s 16-year-old son was diagnosed with autism 13 years ago, she was depressed. Then, within a year, her mom was diagnosed with cancer.

“I went through a whole stage of ‘Why me?’ ” she said.

“But then I decided, ‘Why not me?’ ... I started to realize that today’s the only day that’s guaranteed, and I want to go out with a bang.”

Wolk said she made a conscious decision to be happy, sunny and more optimistic.

“I have found that the more positive vibe I put out there, it really does come back to you,” she said. “Happiness is a choice. I think you can either choose to be happy, or you can choose to be miserable.”

March is National Optimism Month, but with the rising unemployment rates, a poor housing market and lingering winter weather, there’s plenty of reasons to see the glass as half empty.

Wolk said she understood why people become depressed, but she reminded herself not to let her problems get the best of her.

“It’s going to turn around, it can’t stay bad forever,” she said.

Nancy Apperson, Northern Illinois University Employee Assistance Program coordinator, said that’s exactly the attitude people should have if they wanted to be more optimistic.

“People who are optimistic tend to believe they’ll get through this,” Apperson said. “They let go of what they can’t do anything about.”

Apperson also said optimism actually could lead to a more successful life.

“The most optimistic candidates usually win the presidency. The most optimistic coaches usually win the game” she said. “Optimistic people live longer, they are healthier and have more resilience against depression.”

A positive outlook also is something that can be learned and reinforced, said Willa Wertheimer, clinical psychologist at Advocacy Counseling Center in Woodstock.

“What we believe affects what we perceive,” she said. “You can develop a rhythm of making everything work.”

When her patients have a negative or pessimistic view of the world, she said she sits them down and evaluates their logic.

“Logically we have possibilities to have good things happen,” Wertheimer said. “It’s not that there’s cotton candy falling from the sky, it’s that we have the ability to get the best possible outcome.”

And, if people change their outlook, they can change their attitude, Apperson said.

“The biggest key with optimism is you have to give yourself credit for what you do well,” she said. “And then when you fail, look at that in a very specific, concrete way. It’s learning from what you’ve done, rather than generalizing and saying, ‘It was terrible, it was awful.’”

Marcus Bieschke, pastor of the McHenry County branch of Willow Creek Community Church, said he believed optimism, which is a core Christian value, was vital.

“It’s not that all Christians are nailing this,” he said. “[But] our faith is entirely about optimism.”

The idea is that an optimistic outlook also can spread to those around you, he said.

“When someone has encouraging words, it’s life to the bones,” he said. “Friends or acquaintances ... either bring us down or bring us up.”

Wolk said that was exactly her goal – to brighten the days of those she meets.

“I want people at my funeral to be like, ‘Wow, she was funny. She was a good person. She was a giver,’” she said. “If you’re happy, it just magnifies and it just multiplies around you.”