Dads share dreams for babies’ futures
By JAMI KUNZER jkunzer@nwherald.com
Around the room, women with rounded bellies tried to find comfortable spots in straight-back chairs.
The men beside them rubbed their shoulders, patted their backs.
“Enjoy each other,” said Dr. Michael Gronberg, a pediatrician with Centegra Primary Care in Crystal Lake. “Things are going to change.”
This new life is something the dads-to-be have thought about daily, and likely will be thinking about even more this Father’s Day.
Dr. Gronberg talked about everything from bathing the baby to sleep schedules to changing diapers as part of a presentation for Centegra Health System’s prenatal education course.
“It’s just a lot to try to digest,” said Rob Bonner of Wonder Lake.
He and his wife Stephani are expecting a girl next month and plan to name her Ryan. It’s not the basic care he worries about most, it’s the world around them.
He and his wife both work in the retail industry and like many, are concerned about the economy.
“It’s probably a thought that goes through your head every day,” he said.
That, and outside influences his children might face, he said.
“I can do everything right, and boy, if somebody comes around with something flashy, he or she is going to be so easily influenced, that’s what scares me the most,” he said.
He said he especially hopes to teach his daughter tolerance, “the one thing that’s missing in the world these days.”
“At the end of the day, that you do more good than bad,” he said. “If everybody did that, it would be a perfect world.”
Bonner said he intends to be as involved as possible. His parents both worked multiple jobs to support a family of seven children.
It’s something many parents these days are being forced to do as well, said Casey Seyller, of Harvard, who’s expecting a girl next month with his wife, Kristi.
An elementary school teacher and high school coach in Harvard, Seyller said he’s thankful he and his wife’s jobs are secure. Kristi works as a dental hygienist.
“It’s a little bit scary,” he said, but it’s pointless to wait around until you have “enough money.” Because “you’re never going to have money when you have kids,” he said.
He said he likely will parent like his parents, who let him make his own decisions while guiding him in the right direction.
Andrew Skalski of Cary, who’s expecting a boy with his wife, Jeanette, in August, looks forward to building tree forts with his son and working around the house.
“I plan to be very involved, definitely as much as I can,” said Skalski, who works full-time for the Cary Park District and as a firefighter in Cary. “We’ll try to get as close to 50-50 as possible.”
Balancing work and family is David Wilcox’s biggest concern. Wilcox and his wife, Karin, of Crystal Lake, already have 2-year-old Michael and another boy on the way.
A U.S. Army sergeant and recruiter, he said he sometimes has to work long hours.
“I think a lot of fathers are trying to be more involved with their kids,” he said. “I know for me, I’m trying to do stuff my father didn’t do with me, playing with him more. I look forward to that age when he goes to baseball games and stuff like that, stuff that’s really important in their lives to help them mature and become better people.”
Wilcox said he hopes his children are successful and enjoy life with no regrets.
“There’s no book on how to raise a child,” he said. “You do the best you can.”
Shawn Ronxio of McHenry who is expecting a boy in August with his wife-to-be, Jessica Cox, simply wants to be a good role model.
He proposed to Jessica about two weeks before the couple found out she was pregnant. They plan to get married in July of next year.
At age 23, Ronxio works as a full-time mover, but hopes to own his own mobile oil change business one day. Right now, though, he said he needs to pay the bills.
“It’s hard to find a good career because of the rough economy,” he said. “That’s the only thing that makes me nervous is not making enough money to support my child. Everything else is exciting.”
