Krug: Crosstown scene all wrong
I guess it was just after the woman who had been seated behind me on the upper deck of the Chicago-bound Metra train wound her way down to the first level and opened a bottle of Red Stripe beer using the stainless steel door of the lavatory that it struck me.
Well, maybe it was before that, when she was trying to pry off the top with her teeth.
Regardless of precisely when it was, it became clear somewhere in there that this wasn’t your ordinary, average, everyday junket to a Major League Baseball game.
It was, after all, 10:45 a.m. Thursday. The beer was her fourth.
I know this because she announced that fact to the entire train car, raising the frothing bottle to shoulder height of her Cubs mini-dress while letting out a rousing “WOO-HOO” that no doubt echoed from the east side of Des Plaines, through Park Ridge, and well into the western quarters of Edison Park.
A man from downstate Atlanta, Ill., in town to help his recently graduated daughter get settled in and ready for a new job at a bank in Chicago, turned to me and asked, “Is it always like this on the train?”
I explained that it only was kind of like this 81 times a year, and exactly like this on the six days each year when the Cubs and Sox played each other.
Gotta love the crosstown series.
Then again, maybe not.
Now don’t get me wrong; the baseball remains phenomenal. And Thursday’s 6-5 Cubs win, in which they rallied for four runs late in the game to tie it before eventually winning on a bloop single in the ninth, only adds to the tradition of competitive interactions between the Cubs and Sox.
No, the baseball is fine.
The rivalry is healthy. Perhaps even cordial. Well, I’ll try to not get carried away.
But there is a huge problem with the crosstown series, and that problem isn’t with anyone other than ourselves.
Somewhere along the line it became mandatory to show up drunk, drink a beer every half-inning, and then drink until the last train rolled down the tracks.
I looked up the effects of drinking 18 beers in an afternoon. According to the Internet, in addition to setting you back a little more than $112 for those 18 beers at Wrigley Field, drinking 288 ounces of beer in one sitting (or stumbling) actually is quite bad for your health.
Had I possessed this newfound information ahead of time, I gladly would have shared it with the gentleman who stumbled into the bar near the Irving Park Metra station on Thursday evening. He was wearing half a shirt (not a half-shirt, but approximately half of the shirt he had started with, mind you) and his face was covered with bruises. I was told that he and a friend – both Cubs fans – had elevated a spirited discussion between the two of them into a full-blown fistfight, complete with cuts, scratches and abrasions.
I assume that this guy went into work Friday. Would have loved to hear how he explained his new look to the boss.
I’m guessing it went a little something like: “Yeah, you see, boss, that sliding screen door on the back porch, you know, the one I’ve been wanting to fix, well, it darn near came off the tracks during that ridiculous storm we had this morning, and well, I musta lost a hold of the handle because it came flying right back at me. Yeah, at least six or seven times. It was terrible, boss. Really bad.”
I’d like to tell you that it wasn’t once this way – that when the crosstown series became an annual event 12 years ago through the birth of interleague play, the renewal of the Cubs-Sox rivalry was a sterling example of what professional sports should embody.
But, of course, I can’t do that. Because that would be patently false.
The series always has been a raucous romp. The vibe in and around Wrigley Field is worse, if only because it seems that even the water fountains dispense Old Style. Maybe it’s just a case of getting older and finding less comedic value in having to fight through a crowd that always seems perched on the precipice of pugilism.
Then again, I’m not sure why the crosstown series has to be like Mardi Gras without the beads. Or like New Year’s Eve in Las Vegas. Or why I have to discard the pair of shoes I wore to the game, knowing that no magical product that TV pitchman Billy Mays ever could dream up would have the resolve to remove the stench.
Perhaps I’m just disappointed. The crosstown series has the potential to be an incredible social event wrapped around one of the most interesting sports rivalries on the planet. For six days each summer, everyone who has a rooting interest in Chicago baseball can focus on a single game. It should be a wonderful experience.
It’s the kind of stuff that you’d like to share with your 10-year-old or with your grandmother, but cannot for fear that they would come home soaked in beer and boasting vocabularies with new, yet confounding, four-letter words.
These games should be accessible to all fans, and not only to those who are only too happy to prove that they can open beer bottles with their eye sockets.
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The first to know: I’ve been testing the new TextAlerts offered through NWHerald.com for the past few weeks, and the results have been very good. It was reassuring to receive the breaking text alerts about the storms that danced through the area Friday morning.
If you haven’t had the chance to sign up, give it a look. It’s a totally free service that will allow you to keep up with breaking news and weather. Click to NWHerald.com and click the TextAlerts icon in the upper right-hand corner of the homepage, or just click here.
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Gavers, Gavers, Gavers: Thanks to Dave Robertson for reminding me to remind you about the upcoming Gavers Community Cancer Foundation Get Ridin’, Get Checked Motorcycle Run & Rally. Registration begins at 8 a.m. Sunday, July 12. Bikes start to roll out from the Woodstock Public House between 9 and 10 a.m. This year’s ride stretches 80 miles and culminates at Woodstock Harley-Davidson. A ticket to ride is $25, and includes breakfast at the Public House and lunch at Woodstock H-D. To register in advance, call 815-337-3511.
And while we are on the subject, go ahead and jot down this other Gavers data.
This year’s tent event schedule at Emricson Park in Woodstock includes a concert on Friday, July 17, that stars country music performer Pat Green. Tickets for his performance are $29 and available through Ticketmaster.com.
The 10th annual Barn Dance, which in my opinion is consistently one of the most enjoyable local fundraisers each year, is scheduled for Saturday, July 18. Tickets for the Barn Dance are $50, and will be available at the door. However, if bought before July 1, organizers are offering four tickets for the price of three. Call 815-338-2300 to reserve yours.
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And finally … : Happy Father’s Day, my friend.
• Chris Krug is executive editor of the Northwest Herald. Contact Chris by calling 815-459-4122 or via e-mail at ckrug@nwherald.com. Keep up with Chris’ random rants, raves and insights by following ChrisKrug (no space) at Twitter.com.